Now before you pack your bags for that 90-degree weather in Miami for Sizzle….you better make sure you pack your credit cards, debit cards, food stamps, checks, yo momma’s credit cards, and you might want to ask Ms. Jenkins across the street for a loan from her Social Security check. Because by the time you get back home you are going to be flat broke, overdraft on your bank account, and if you don’t watch it, some of ya’ll will have an eviction notice the second week in June.
The Sizzle greed machine is coming and the vast majority of us is going to get mugged. Sizzle has released the cover charges for its day and night events and if you haven’t seen it, I strongly suggest you take a look. I will give you a second…..don’t forget to come back….(www.sizzleMiami.com).Did you need to catch your breath after that LONG gasp like I did. And how convenient that this information is released by the Sizzle greed machine a little over a month before the event. Too late to cancel those hotel reservations, too late to tell Delta “Honey, they have lost their mind in Miami”, and cancel those airlines tickets, unless you were smart and got refundable tickets. But who has money for that. If you have not done the math, let me do it for you…if you were to attend every Sizzle event, including the Booze Cruise, Queens of Comedy, Beach Party, etc. and go to the club every night BEFORE 11:30pm, this little ching-dig in Miami is going to cost you little over 300 dollars, just to party. YES, you say right Three-Zero-Zero. And that is before you had your first cocktail at the bar. Now if you are one of those slow pokes who like to take his time to get to the club, you will be paying much more. And then for you impatient queens and thugs who don’t like to wait in line, you will be paying upwards of $50 per night to rocket pass everyone else. You might be thinking that is not all that bad, it’s Memorial Day weekend in Miami and I only live once. You forgot one thing fool…you haven’t paid for where you going to sleep (if not at the host hotel), your rental car (how else you going to get to Aventura mall), and you still haven’t eaten.
I feel so bad for our out of town visitors. YES, the economy is in a recession. I expect smaller crowds in Miami because a lot of people don’t have it like we all did, a year ago. YES, blame Bush! You seen a lot of this if you attended the Winter Music Conference in Miami a few weeks back. The crowds were not as big as last year, the clubs were not as crowded, but it was still an okay time. I find it appalling that the Sizzle Greed Machine is trying to rob me. Now, if they were saying we are donating some of profits to the South Beach Aids Project, Habitat to Help Humanity, or Ms Jenkins to get some new dentures, I would feel a little bit better. But I know that is not what is happening or what is going to happen. For those of you, who will be in town and if you figure already, your funds will be on the low side I will list some alternatives and places to go as Memorial Day weekend draws closer. Miami is a BIG PARTY CITY. And, fortunately for you, Sizzle is not the only game in town that weekend. I will be reporting on some of the events of Sizzle. But luckily for me, I live here in Miami in my downtown apartment, I can leave my car in the garage and walk to the club, and my deep freezer is fully stocked. I am going to hold on tight to my purse because I refuse to be rob-blind by a greedy Sizzle machine.
Hold onto Your Wallets..the Sizzle Greed Machine is Loose! - Article from King D in Miami